We all know this is going to suck.  HARD.  I don't think there is anyone really left to be optimistic about the Dragonball Evolution movie.  Even Chow Yun Fat couldn't save this.  I don't even think Sammy L. could have saved this.  That brings us though to the toys.  Perhaps the toy line could maybe get us interested in this movie.  In a word, nope.  Hit the jump to check out the fail that is Dragonball Evolution.

In this post, I'm solely gonna go off on the toys and nothing else.  I won’t go into the point of debating canon or accuracy since it’s a Dragon Ball movie.  I’m taking this up as solely a movie and toy line.  With that said, the only good thing that came out of this was an Ayumi Hamasaki single.  That's it.

Now, for the toys themselves, they're divided into 3 lines; basic, deluxe and action-feature.  The basics are just that, very basic.  Minimal articulation and what you'd expect for a $7 figure.  They won't do much other than lift up arms and legs and stand there. 

The deluxe gets a bit better, as the figures are a bit more detailed and come with extra parts.  The parts though are just there to get you to buy 'dem all, as included is a dragon ball along with a piece of a build a figure.  For your effort and patience, if you actually buy all 7 figures in the deluxe line, you'll get all 7 dragon balls and a translucent blue figure of Oozaru.  This figure, to say the least, is fugly.  Build-a-figures can be awesome.  I'm reminded immediately of the awesome Sentinel and Galactus BAFs from the Marvel Legends line.  Instead, we're given this translucent blue piece of crap that had exited from Dr. Manhattan's rectum.  What makes this even more of an ugly blue piece of crap, this is supposed to be the movie's version of the Saiyan's giant ape form.  What.  I'm just going to leave it at that.

If you have always wanted a figure that can punch as fast as you see in the show, well, they at least tried.  The action feature line features 3 figures, Goku, Yamcha, and Piccolo.  Goku and Piccolo both have the same feature, rapid rapid punching.  In Yamcha's case, just one of his legs go up and down to simulate kicking.  This is accomplished by having two sets of arms in each arm.  There is a zip-cord in the back, once it's pulled, the arms go flying.  So the figure will have four arms throwing punches in a rapid motion, simulating the style of fighting seen in the movie and made golden by the show.  What could have been great instead turns out mediocre, as the motion isn't that fast and you're left with a figure of Goku with 4 arms.

When Bandai of America acquired the rights to make Dragon Ball toys 2 years ago, I was excited as maybe we might finally get to see some of the Hybrid Action series finally get released here.  Unfortunately, Bandai's efforts have been rather lame, bringing over only gashapon in clamshells and the crap that is the Dragon Ball Evolution toy line.